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Dec
11

Tips for Moving with Young Children

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Moving can upset children of any age. It frequently causes them to feel apprehensive and insecure. But, dont despair; there are many things you can do to make the moving experience less scary for your children.

Involve Them from the Very Beginning.

Tell your children as soon as you know youre moving; dont spring it on them at the last minute. Explain why youre moving in terms they can understand. Do you need more room? Are you relocating because of a new job? Be sure to explain what will happen so theyll know what to expect. This will remove a lot of the fear and confusion they may be feeling. Tell them when the move will take place and how their things will get from the old house to the new house. Be sure and answer their questions as fully as you can. Remember that your attitude about the move will rub off on them, so stay upbeat and positive. To help prepare them further, you canchoose from among many childrens books available on moving. Just a couple of these are Berenstain Bears Moving Day by Sam Berenstain and Goodbye House by Frank Asch. Check your local library for more.

Make the Move an Adventure.

If you approach the coming move as an exciting adventure for the entire family, it will help to calm your childrens fears. The more positive you are about the move, the more positive they will be. Make sure they understand they wont be left behind. Ask for their suggestions and involve them in the plans. If its possible, show them the new house and let them spend some time exploring it. Show them where their rooms will be. Help them visualize where their furniture and toys will go. Show them the yard and help them imagine all the fun they will have there. If its impossible for them to visit the new house, take tons of photos so theyll know what it looks like and can become familiar with it. Talk about all the fun things the family will do there.

Let Them Help.

If you give your children an active role in the move they are much more likely to accept it and even grow excited about it. Let them pack some of their own belongings, even if you have to go back and repack them later. This will help them feel a part of the move. If there are old toys you dont plan to take, let the kids help decide which of them should be given away for other children to use and which should be discarded.

What to Do on Moving Day.

The best plan is to have the children stay with a family member or trusted friend on the day of the move. If this isnt possible, be sure and involve them in the moving activities. If you have a moving company, introduce your children to the workers so theyll know whos taking their stuff away. You can give them a box of their own to pack. This could be the box of special belongings youre taking in the car with you. It should include all the things your children cant live without ~ favorite stuffed animals, that special blanket, maybe their favorite pajamas. This will accomplish three things. It will keep the children occupied and feeling useful and it will also ensure that you know exactly where these special items are. You would never want to arrive at your new home not knowing where to locate Susies scruffy old bear or Johnnys favorite action figure! It will also help the children feel secure since they have their most important belongings with them.

Youre on Your Way to Your New Home.

If youre driving to your new home, make the trip exciting! If the kids can relate the move to family fun, theyll enjoy it so much more. If its a long drive, be sure and have lots of games or books to keep the children occupied. Maybe each person could tell their own story about what they think living in the new house will be like. Youll arrive happy and anxious to start this new phase of your lives.

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Dec
03

The Joy Of Becoming A Father

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In this article I write about my joy of becoming a parent and about how my life has changed since the birth of my son. It came as quite a shock to me a few years ago when my girlfriend told me that she was pregnant. We had in truth been trying for a baby, but I never thought it would happen. I am not really sure why this was, I am stupid I know. I have to admit that I was quite scared at first but now feel very lucky and he has truly changed my life in a positive way.

Around a week before my son was born, I decided to go out for a few beers with a couple of friends. It was like one last night out of freedom before being thrust into parenthood. During this particular night I remember thinking something like, I will miss this. For some reason I actually thought that becoming a father would end any social life that I had and would be the start of a life of choirs.

The feeling of emotion and happiness when I first set eyes on and held my son is very hard to describe . He was so small and light. I was handed some milk to feed him and he soon started to knock it back, a bit like me with the beer I thought to myself. My girlfriend left the room to have a bath and I was left in the room on my own, holding the baby as they say. I could not stop staring at him, he was so perfect. Scared, what an idiot I thought, you are the luckiest man alive.

My whole attitude to life has now changed, in the past socialising with my friends was a massive part of my life. Even though I still do go out with them, I have to say it is probably only around half as much as I used to. You might think I am sad but when I am out I do miss all of my family including my son.

Every morning he is the first one to wake up and walks into our room and says, morning! I wake up and there in front of me is my son with a beaming smile on his face. Can you get me some breakfast dad please? He loves his food! This is the best type of alarm I have ever had.

I have always been the type of person who is often anxious and stressed. This can even turn into a period of sustained depression. Nowadays whenever I feel any of these symptoms I spend as much time as possible with my son as he soon puts a smile back onto my face.

I feel very sorry for people who are unable to have children and find it very hard to understand people who choose not to have any.

I am as you can no doubt tell, a very proud parent and would do anything for my son. Even when he is naughty I find it hard to be angry at him for more than about two minutes. I have recently spent a weekend at a friends stag party. I have to say it was a lot of fun and I had a great time but despite all of this I could not wait to get back home.

I now have something to really live for and the future is really exciting for possibly the first time in my life.

There are many things that I am looking forward to including:

Taking my son for his first beer

Taking my son to watch the football

Taking my son to play snooker

Seeing my son with his first girlfriend

Becoming a grandad

These of course are just a small number of many things which really excite me in the future.

For any people out there who are unsure about whether they wany to become a parent, I can honestly say that from a personal experience it has been amazing.

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Nov
26

Teens and Alcohol

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It’s the standard at every weekend party: a case of beer, a keg, many hard liquor bottles and mixed drinks. Alcohol is everywhere these days, and teens (as well as adults) can’t keep their hands off it. Teens are getting drunk just about every weekend during the school year, and even more during the summer.

But why do teens insist on drinking? Is it peer pressure? Is it the thrill of doing something illegal? Do they think it will make them cooler in the eyes of others? Most likely, it’s one (or more) of these reasons. Teens are easily pressured into things. Almost all of them want to be accepted, and are willing to do just about anything to gain acceptance. Even the smartest student in school could very well be giving in to peer pressure, drinking, doing drugs, and having promiscuous sex.

Most Parents wouldn’t like to think of their child being the one to give in. “My child is smarter than that,” they say. While it is quite possible your child is very intelligent, it takes a very strong willed teen to just say “no.” The fact is that most teens will give in to peer pressure at one time or another, whether it be with alcohol or something else.

Parents need to be on the watch when it comes to their teens. Make sure you know where they’re going and verify that parents are going to be there. This will likely assure that drinking will not take place, but it is still a possibility. Make sure your teen knows the consequences and dangers of alcohol over-consumption, such as liver damage and alcohol poisoning. Teens usually have a different attitude about it if their parents explain to them the effects of alcohol. Parents work a lot better than health class in school, and can be more personal.

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Nov
15

Stuttering Toddler

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For a parent, it is a big shock when their young toddler starts to stutter. What to do next is hard to decide, whether to seek help from a stutter specialist or to hope it is just a phase.

I met a lady who was thirty and her little boy aged four had had a stutter for quite a while. She had taken him to speech therapy and was extremely anxious as to why he had started to stutter. It had possibly started because the toddlers father had quite a severe stutter, the boy may of picked up his stutter this way.

Many other people contact me asking why their toddler has developed a stutter and asking what forms of stutter treatments are available.

I always suggest that they keep as patient as they can and try to play games, speech games with their child. They can challenge the child to say the word fluently, they show their child how it should be said and then challenge them to do the same. When they do manage to say that particular word fluently they then heap lots of praise onto the child, telling them how clever they are and how proud mommy and daddy are of them. I even advise giving them a reward like a small chocolate bar.

If instead of being patient, parents or relatives are aggressive, saying things like:

“Get your words out boy”

“Spit it out!”

These types of comments can have a very negative effect and make that child withdraw into their shell. This may to some people seem very obvious to say, however you would not believe the amount of people who have told me this is what they were told as an infant.

I had a stutter myself from the age of four. I went to see many speech therapists who offered me advice which basically consisted of slowing down my rate of speech and to take a deep breath before I spoke. This did not really work for me and I have to admit my attitude was not what it should have been as I believed that it was impossible for the therapist to understand what I was going through as they had never had a stutter.

After coping with the speech impediment for eighteen years I had had enough and went about trying to find my own stuttering solution.

It took me nearly a year to beat the stutter and as a career I now help other people to achieve fluency.

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Teach your Child to Give Respect and They’ll Gain Respect in Return

One of the most important things you can teach your child is respect and the best way to teach respect is to show respect. When a child experiences respect, they know what it feels like and begin to understand how important it is.

Keep in mind the saying “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Respect is an attitude. Being respectful helps a child succeed in life. If children don’t have respect for peers, authority, or themselves, it’s almost impossible for them to succeed. A respectful child takes care of belongings and responsibilities, and a respectful child gets along with peers.

Schools teach children about respect, but parents have the most influence on how respectful children become. Until children show respect at home, it’s unlikely they will show it anywhere else.

How can you show respect to your child? If you do something wrong, admit it and apologize. Don’t embarrass, insult or make fun of your child. Compliment them and let your child make choices and take responsibility. Listen to your child’s side of the story before making a decision on an issue or problem. Be polite and use “please” and “thank you” when asking them to do things. Knock before entering your child’s room. Keep promises. Show your child that you mean what you say. And give your child your full attention.

And most important, teach your children that respect is earned. Make sure that you are leading by example and modeling respectful behavior. Be a law-abiding citizen. Show concern for your environment, animals and other people. Openly and honestly discuss exampled of witnessed disrespect.

In addition, teach your child to respect themselves. Self-respect is one of the most important forms of respect. Once we respect ourselves, it is easier to respect others.
Help them set and achieve goals. Encourage honesty and teach them that people make mistakes, and that they are the best way to learn.

Most importantly, praise your child often for good deeds, behaviors or traits, and tell them you love them at least several times each day. You’re sure to raise a child capable of giving and gaining respect.

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It’s impossible to list all the different skills you need, and decisions that you have to make, as a new parent. Although you should try to educate yourself and talk to other parents, in most cases the best solution for any questions you may have is to follow your instincts. Parenting is, after all, one of the most natural things in the world. One of the most common and difficult things you’ll deal with as the parent of a newborn is in getting your child to sleep well and throughout the night. Often, the process of achieving this seems to be a combination of science, art, and just plain luck. There are many baby sleep tips out there, and many of them are useful, but before you begin researching and applying them, you should develop a realistic and healthy attitude towards sleep. If you don’t do this, you risk applying tips in a rigid and scattershot manner, which isn’t likely to work.

One of the keys to this is understanding that you should be developing a long term goal, in terms of your baby’s sleep habits. As much as any parent’s short term goal is simply to get their child to go to sleep, so that she can get some sleep herself, you should be thinking of the long term goal of instilling healthy sleep habits in your child. A successful way to implement this goal is to be realistic and flexible. Your child is not going to sleep the same way or in the same manner every night. What you should be trying to do, therefore, is creating an environment that is conducive to sleep, so that your child can slowly learn to fall asleep on his own.

The best thing you can do is help your child develop an attitude in which sleep is both an enjoyable and secure state. Your child should think of sleep as a comforting thing that comes naturally. One way you can help foster this idea is by avoiding too much interference with your child’s sleeping habits. Although it can be tempting to follow guides and implement rigid rules regarding your child’s sleep, in many cases this can cause problems down the road.

If you rouse or put your child to bed at set hours, you may achieve a short term goal of getting some rest, but you may also be altering your child’s attitudes towards sleep. Instead of thinking of sleep as an enjoyable activity, he will begin to think of it as something he “has to do” like eating his dinner. By altering your child’s attitude towards sleep in this way – by making him think of it as a task rather than an enjoyable activity – you risk problems developing later.

In older children and adults who have sleeping problems, doctors can often trace the source of the problem back to sleeping habits enforced at an extremely young age. If as a baby the subject was put to bed at a set hour, for example, regardless of weather he was tired or not. By trying to stay more in tune with how your baby is feeling and what he wants, you will encourage a healthier attitude towards sleep, which will benefit both you and your child in the future.

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How can you tell if your teenager is at risk for developing drug or alcohol problems, depression, violence, suicide, pregnancy or dropping out of school? While many teens may actually face these problems, parents often find it difficult to tell if their child is having problems; many parents only find out that their teen is experiencing difficulty after it is too late. Many parents compare their child with other children as a way of not having to cope with their childs behavior. They might say things such as oh, well, my child is not as bad as so and so, and so to them, they figure everything must be ok. While this might be tempting to do, it is not an action that should be encouraged. Instead, you should trust your instincts when they tell you something is not right, and try to help as soon as you can. Many teens are very good at lying, manipulating and twisting the truth for their parents; especially parents who are willing to turn a blind eye because they are not ready to face the truth. It is important to be strong and not let your child be the boss of your relationship.

It is true that most, if not all teens go through some hardships and rebellion while growing up, but how can you tell if this is just normal maturation or if your teen truly has a problem. There are several tell-tale signs that let you know if you are dealing with a troubled teen.

1. You have noticed that your child is becoming more and more secretive.
2. Your teen has sudden and uncalled for outbursts of anger.
3. Your teen regularly misses curfew and does not show up when he/she says they will.
4. They regularly lie about where they are.
5. They have changed their group of friends and does not want you to meet them. Usually the group of friends will lead to a distinct new appearance such as piercings or excessive black makeup and a negative change in attitude.
6. They steel money from you on a regular basis.
7. Their grades have dropped significantly or they lose interest in previous activities.

If you notice some of these in your child, perhaps you should take a closer look at what is happening in their lives. If you find that they are experiencing some sort of trouble, you should try to help them as soon as you can without appearing too pushy or domineering. Since this is a childs time for searching for independence they will not want to feel controlled by you. To get advice on how to talk to your teen you can contact local help centers or look for advice on the internet. And remember, while these symptoms can sometimes be serious, this is how teens behave, and not all kids are troubled kids!

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Planning a baby shower should entail the careful incorporation of ideas as well as the budget for the whole event. You would not want to come up with something that will reflect the this-will-do attitude of most people.

Consequently, baby shower games, as part of the celebration, should be meticulously prepared. However, not all baby showers have games on their plans. But the fact that it is a great ice-breaker, many baby shower coordinators are incorporating the idea of having baby shower games in the party.

With the advent of the Internet, there are many baby shower game ideas made available online. The best thing about it is that most of the baby shower games available on the Internet are free. Hence, for people who are really tight on the budget, they can get hold of the benefits that free baby shower games can give them.

But then again, free baby shower games are not for everybody. There are people who contend that free baby shower games are not the ideal games to be used in the baby shower.

Here are some of the disadvantages about the free baby shower games.

1. Free baby shower games do not look nice.

Most people contend that the printouts of the free printable baby shower games available online are better than the free baby shower games available in the market. This is because most of the free baby shower games are just plain handouts, with no artistic creations embedded in it.

2. Most parents would appreciate it more if you will not use free baby shower games.

The value or the money is not the issue here but on how baby shower games are used or executed. Because free baby shower games usually lacks quality materials, it would be better not to include them in the party than to make it appear that the event and the preparation was just taken for granted.

3. If there were a budget, it would be better not to use free baby shower games.

If you have a budget for the baby shower as well as the games, it would be better to use the games that were designed professionally.

Besides, baby shower games are not at all expensive when compared to free baby shower games.

4. Believe on the saying, you will get what you have paid for.

This would mean that if you have obtained a baby shower game for free, then, expect something that is not meticulously and artistically created because there are no capitals or investments used to make the creation attractive.

If you obtained a baby shower game that is worth your money, chances are, you will have quality baby shower games to enjoy in the party.

The bottom line is that baby shower games should not be taken for granted. It does not necessarily mean that free baby shower games are really bad or is not worth using. But the fact that the event is such a momentous occasion for the parents-to-be, then, it would be better to come up with baby shower games that would reflect the joy and happiness of the people on the arrival of the baby.

After all, baby shower games are not that expensive so there is no sense in getting free baby shower games.

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Dec
19

Children of the 21st century

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The good old days as I remember them were just that, the good old days.
Children of the 21st century

Playing hopscotch hide and seek even a game of rounders was all in a day’s fun for a thirteen year old in the good old days. Of course all good things come to an end when called in against your will and ordered up the stairs to wash behind your ears before bed, while the children of the 21st century slap on war paint to disguise their identities for approval into many disco night clubs. .

Succeeding in their mission to gain those added years they would then dance and party till dawn, while I remember back to my navy blue knickers and white vest hanging up to dry in front of an open coal fire for school the next morning.

The nature and attitude of the Children of the 21st century is so different from the days long gone. Children today have a lifestyle not a childhood, whose fault is that I ask. Where do the answers lie?

Remembering back to the words of Mother in the good old days, “There is your dinner”! Now it is “what you would like for dinner”? Another household saying of Mum’s was “I can not afford that”. Twenty first century mums can by doing an extra shift at work.

And in the in the good old days the threats cast upon us from Mother, threats like, are you looking for a good hiding, No I was not looking for a good hiding, but you never dared to answer back unless of course you were looking for another clout. Nowadays it is the other way round, where a great many Mothers live under threat from their own flesh and blood.

“Where do the answers lie” I ask myself once again.

Drinking was strictly for the adults in the good old days not for teens on the street corner who are not long out of nappies. Drugs in the good old days were prescribed by a Doctor not a dealer, the only dealer we knew of in those days were the ones who dealt the cards in a game of snap.

Will the Children of the 21st Century ever learn? Yes given the right teacher, that being Mummy and Daddy, then as your star pupil begins to grow up he learns to respect his/her elders, that now being Mum or Dad.

Giving into your children’s needs and wants is not helping them for the big bad world out there, teach them to stand on their own two feet and if that means going back to the good old days then so be it. Which isn’t so bad just to hear the laughter of children growing up in their own time.

I think we all know where the answer lie for why the Children of the 21st century don’t laugh any more.

http://www.benidormbeaches.com

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Did you know that there is a 1 in 42 chance that YOUR child will become lost, missing, or abducted? In other words…those are not odds in your favor! To many people have become very complacent about child safety. They seem to have a “It couldn’t happen to my child” attitude. You can believe that if you ask any of the parents of missing children, they thought the same thing. And you can also bet, their attitude has changed significantly.

What can you do, right now, that will dramatically put those odds back in your control? Start using “code words” in your family, today.

Here are the most important basics of using code words. Let’s begin…

Who uses the code word? Other than his/her parents, there should be only one or two relatives or very close, trusted family friends that a child should be taught are “special” enough to trust to pick him/her up from school or some other activity away from home.

When do you use the code word? If you are not able to pick up your child at an agreed upon time, and there is no way for you to contact your child, you should contact the “special person” to pick up your child. In the rare event that you cannot pick up your child, and you cannot reach the “special person”, the family code word MUST be used.

What should I use for the family “code word?” The family code word is a pre-determined word that should be very easy for your child to remember, but one that would be very difficult for someone else to guess. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT! I will repeat this: The code word must be simple for your child to remember, yet very difficult for someone to guess. Some suggestions I recommend to use would be names of animals, such as, crocodile, giraffe, baboon, goldfish. DO NOT USE names that are common around your house. Such as, never use the name of your child’s favorite animal or pet.

Never choose a “code word” that is from things that are common to your family or house. Be creative, and make this a fun activity with your children. And be very specific. Don’t just decide on “bear” for your code word, how about using a “purple bear.” Remember, child safety should be fun. You don’t want to frighten your children.

How does my child use the code word system? If anyone other than yourself, your spouse, or the “special person” say’s they are there to pick up your child on your authority, your child should know to ask that person, “What’s the code word?” You should teach your child to disbelieve anyone who tries to pick them up if they do not know the code word.

Do I continue to use the same code word, always? Definately not! After an emergency situation arises where the code word must be used, the family needs to pick a new code word. Emphasize to the children that they should no longer respond to the old one. Be sure to review the new code word often enough to help al family members to remember it.

let me conclude this article on child safety by telling you that code words work. They have saved the lives of many children. This simple, yet highly effective tool is widely used by many families. There have been many, many police reports of children using the code word tool successfuly.

Remember to keep it fun, because keeping it fun, is keeping your children safe!

Until next time…

Spend some time with the kids, and have an incredible day!

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