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Two boys in a first grade classroom were arguing loudly over an item they both wanted to use at the same time.

Their teacher approached them in a friendly way and said, Boys, it sounds like you two are having a problem. Lets talk it out.

One of the boys told his side of the story, his face still tense but his voice lowered to an indoor volume. The second boy listened and then, without any prompting, came up with a solution to which the first boy readily agreed.

Great job! the teacher beamed. See? You can talk it out!

A TEACHING PERSPECTIVE CAN PRODUCE AMAZING RESULTS WHEN KIDS BEHAVE INAPPROPRIATELY.

If we as parents approach unwanted behavior with the idea that our job is to be the judge/jury/jailer, our first impulse may be to punish.

But punishment doesnt teach kids what they SHOULD be doing. It doesnt expand kids problem-solving skills, teach them how to repair social mistakes, or improve their social perception.

Fortunately, punishment isnt the only available tool.

WE CAN CHOOSE TO VIEW THE INAPPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR AS A TEACHABLE MOMENT.

When the teacher in the story above heard the two boys arguing, she spotted a chance to teach better social problem-solving.

Inviting the boys to talk it out reminded them of their capacity to problem-solve without shouting or arguing. They saw that talking it out could work, and they were more likely to talk it out next time.

A teaching perspective has room for punishment in some cases, but the focus is on helping kids learn the skills they need to behave appropriately.

If we view inappropriate behavior as a learning opportunity for the child, new options open up.

HERE ARE TEN CHOICES FOR MAKING THE MOST OF A TEACHABLE MOMENT:

1. Redirect the child toward a more appropriate activity.

2. Inform the child that what theyre doing isnt a good idea or isnt safe.

3. Give a friendly reminder about the rule the child needs to be following.

4. Guide the child through the steps of apologizing.

5. Ask the child to consider how others feel when she engages in the inappropriate behavior.

6. Help the child make amends to anyone negatively affected by the inappropriate behavior. Ask, What can we do to help (name of person) feel better now?

7. In the case of a conflict, prompt the children to talk it out, providing assistance as needed.

8. Give a new rule, if the situation wasnt covered by the rules the child has already been taught.

9. Invite the child to think of a better to way to ask for what they want or need in the situation.

10. Teach the child appropriate words/behaviors to replace the inappropriate ones.

The rules of appropriate social behavior take a long time to learn and an even longer time to internalize as habits. Even adults dont do it perfectly!

When we use our childs behavior mistakes as opportunities to offer guidance, were giving our child their best chance to become more kind, responsible and socially competent.

Norma Schmidt, LLC (limited liability corporation)

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Getting a toddler to eat something that is good for them, or that you think they should eat, should not become a battle of wills, but it often does. Sometimes with children, the presentation is everything, and they forget what is underneath the fanciful decorations or shapes. Fish is one of the few foods that doesn’t lend itself well to disguises that are cute. But you can make it an undercover favorite with a little creative cooking that the kids and even Mom and Dad will enjoy.

First, you will need to ask yourself how important it is that your child has fish. If you really want them to eat it, you may have to be willing to give way on other issues such as how it is prepared. There are a variety of frozen food companies that present fish in stick, and even fish shapes. But these are wrapped in crumbs, and sometimes partly deep friend before you cook them in the oven. This might not be ideal, but if they will eat it, and get the taste of fish, it may open the door to other, and better choices.

The other options are mostly those that appeal to taste. An excellent way of serving fish is in a sauce. A fillet of haddock can be baked quite nicely with just mushroom or another creamed soup poured over it. If you cut off a child size portion, you can even decorate it with some curls of celery for hair, and sliced pickles for eyes before serving. Use your imagination here.

A lot of children love cheese. Bake your fish until its half done and then cover it in shredded cheddar cheese. Not only do they absolutely get the taste they like, but the extra protein that cheese offers them.

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Constructing Your Child’s Healthy Sense of Self Esteem
Your child’s self esteem is their mental foundation. A self-assured child is confident, secure, happy, well-adjusted and successful. They can solve problems that come their way, and it thrives under a loving parent’s nurturing care.
What are some good ways to built self esteem in your child?
Most importantly, accept your child for who they are, and help them do the same. Teach your child that nobody is perfect, and that everyone makes mistakes. Show them how to learn and grow from their mistakes, and let them know that you also make mistakes. Children with high self esteem are able to take lessons from mistakes and apply them down the road. A child with low self esteem become frustrated and resort to self-depreciating behavior, such as calling themselves ’stupid’ and vowing to ‘never try that again.’
Help your child discover their abilities and talents, and encourage outlets for them to build on and improve them. Praise a child not only for improvements in abilities and skills, but also for the traits they naturally possess.
Encourage your child to make positive choices. Open an honest dialog with your child and discuss the possibilities with them. Children who learn skills for making positive choices when they are younger are well-prepared for the tougher choices they have to make when they are older.
Ensure that you spend lots of quality time with your child, at least once a week. Whether you are shooting baskets or going out to grab a hamburger, take time to talk and keep in touch. If you find it difficult to squeeze in quality time during a hectic week, take the time to talk about things during the drive to school or while they are helping you put the groceries away.

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There are many uses for baby shower graphics, here are just a few:

1. Baby shower graphics can catch the attention of your guests.

2. Baby shower graphics can give a hint or a suggestion to your invitation, about what the affair is all about and the theme of the affair.

3. It is used in invitations to catch the readers attention.

4. A baby shower graphic, without any wording, can provide a clear demonstration of the occasion.

5. It gives beauty, attraction and life to any invitation.

Your own printable baby shower invitations

1. Giving the invitation a design. Using a simple and easy to understand word processor such as the Microsoft Word, decide on and pick the right dimension for your invitation after which you can print out a test on a plain paper to make certain that the size is right.

2. Think of a theme, wherein all colors, designs and graphics will be based from it.

3. Look for and choose a card stock that appeal to your taste, so you can print on your invitations to it. Your local craft or office supply establishment have a variety of designs and they are very affordable too. Remember to choose a paper with not much color in it, as then it would compete with the colors that you may have on your graphic. A simple lightly colored textured paper is best.

4. Using a word processor, insert text boxes; in the text box, type in the wording that you want on your invitation. Here, you can have choices as to what font and color to use. Do keep in mind to keep it simple. Do not be overwhelmed by all the colors you see. At the most, you should only use three colors as too much of it can make your invitation look more of a mess then what it really is.

5. In the net, many sites offer and provide baby shower graphics for free which you can readily use in your invitation. By searching for free graphics on any search engine the results will be plenty, and you will surely find a site offering free graphics. All you have to do is to look at the graphics, choose one, then download and insert them into your invitation; you can change its position, resize it and place it in a position and location that you desire.

6. If you plan to use the baby shower graphic as background, it should not block the wordings on the invitation. Preferably, images set on a background must be watermarked. Almost all word processors allow background images to be selected and chooses them as watermarks.

7. Need a catchy poem for your invitation? Do a search in the net once more for verses related to your invitation. For instance, you can search for “baby shower verse” and results are sure to come in.

8. It is important to save the original copy of your finished invitation and print it out. A sample on plain paper should first be printed in order to see what it looks like. If the results are good, you then can start printing and personalizing each invitation on a stock card.

9. If you have no printer, you can save your file on a disk and bring the disk to your nearest local print shop to have the disk printed out.

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Chores Can Help your Child Learn about Teamwork and a Strong Work Ethic
Chores can help develop a sense of responsibility and self worth in your child. It should be understood by all family members they are expected and necessary to a household running successfully and efficiently. They can help create a sense of unity and family and is a great place for your child to learn about teamwork. Parents should take special care to handle the delegation of chores to children so they don’t become a source of frustration or create arguments.
Allow your child to have an active say in the delegation of chores. Give them choices. We all have household chores that we don’t like to do, but if it’s a chore the child enjoys doing then there’s less likelihood it will create a battle in the end. The child will most likely appreciate having the chance to be heard and having a choice.
It’s imperative that you set parameters early on for the successful completion of a chore. They may not perform up to snuff when they first start performing the chore, but show them where improvement is needed and praise them for a strong effort. Also make sure the child understands there will be repercussions if they only put forth a minimal effort. Ensure the child understands the need for the chore’s effective and efficient completion. Set consequences for substandard completion as a team. Make sure they see that if they don’t perform their chores, it affects the other members of the team. Spouses must work together and be a strong example for their children by completing their own chores each day. And don’t allow a child to undermine your authority by battling with you over a designated chore. Stand your ground and don’t give in, and emphasize the consequence and negative effect an uncompleted chore has on the family.
And keep an open mind when a child wants to discuss their thoughts or express their opinions about chores. Make sure the conversation stays positive and on target.

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Celebrate your Child’s Uniqueness
Just like a snowflake or a fingerprint, every child is unique in their own special way. Every child has a unique way of feeling, thinking, and interacting with others. Some children are shy, while others are outgoing; some are active, while others are calm; some are fretful, while others are easy-going. As a loving and nurturing parent, it’s your job to encourage them to embrace their uniqueness and celebrate their individual qualities.
Allow your child to express themselves through their interests. They may find a creative outlet in theatre, dancing or art, or they may be exceptionally talented in the sciences. Encourage them to embrace what they like to do, what interests them, and what makes them happy. Help them realize that they don’t need to worry about being ‘like everyone else.’
Teach your child to make positive choices, and praise them for good deeds, behaviors and positive traits they possess. Encourage them to become actively involved in their community, and introduce them to activities that promote a sense of cooperation and accomplishment. Be firm yet fair when handing down discipline for misdeeds or misbehaviors, and make certain the rules and consequences for breaking the rules are clearly defined. Show a cooperative, loving and united front with your spouse when it comes to discipline.
Accept and celebrate your child’s uniqueness. Remember that your child is an individual. Allow your child to have his or her own personal preferences and feelings, which may be different from your own.
And finally, encourage your child to be true to themselves by doing the same. Show your child how to make positive choices with the choices you make, and that nobody is perfect and you too make mistakes. Show your child that mistakes can be a great learning experience, and that they should not be ashamed or embarrassed about making them. .

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One thing I hate to do is discipline my son. He is such a good boy most of the time, but when he gets angry he is awful! Disciplining your child is one of the hardest things to do as a parent. It is important that they understand that you are in charge, not them.

I remember getting spankings until I was around 6 or 7 years old. I did everything I could to avoid making my mother and father angry. I havent spanked my son that often, but I have had to pop him when nothing else would work. Today, parents are looking for alternative methods of discipline and avoiding the dreaded spanking.

By the time your baby is 4 years old, you should have already laid down basic rules, no more than 4 or 5. The most important part of setting the rules is to stand by them. Go over the rules with your child whenever they break one. And do not try to explain yourself to your child. You are the parent, what you say goes.

Praise your child on any good behavior they demonstrate. This is reinforce the idea that having good behavior is much better than bad behavior. We spend alot more time scolding them for the bad things they do than on the good things. A simple Thank You is beneficial to your child.

Saying no makes a child very angry. It means that they do not get their way or something they want. Use a firm tone with authority, not an angry one. Make sure your child understands that when you say no, it means no. Dont give in if your child continues to ask or plead; just stand by your decision.

Help your child understand the consequences of their actions or choices. For example, if you are resting and your child is playing too loudly, you can give them the choice of sitting with you and reading a book or going to play in their room until you come to get them.

The one that my husband and I have started using is the time-out. My son hates to sit still. If we have asked him to stop doing something or he yells, we tell him to go to the time-out room and think about his actions. Then we say when he is ready to talk about it, we sit down and talk. This works for most of his bad behavior.

There are many other alternatives; here is a list of sites for you to take a look at:

* * The Top 10 Tips for Disciplining Toddlers by Clare Albright
* * Positive Discipline For Toddlers and Preschoolers by Meg Berger, M.Ed.
* * Help! I Cant Control My Four Year-Old and Dont Want to Resort to Spanking! at http://Parenthood.com

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Celebrate your Child’s Uniqueness
Just like a snowflake or a fingerprint, every child is unique in their own special way. Every child has a unique way of feeling, thinking, and interacting with others. Some children are shy, while others are outgoing; some are active, while others are calm; some are fretful, while others are easy-going. As a loving and nurturing parent, it’s your job to encourage them to embrace their uniqueness and celebrate their individual qualities.
Allow your child to express themselves through their interests. They may find a creative outlet in theatre, dancing or art, or they may be exceptionally talented in the sciences. Encourage them to embrace what they like to do, what interests them, and what makes them happy. Help them realize that they don’t need to worry about being ‘like everyone else.’
Teach your child to make positive choices, and praise them for good deeds, behaviors and positive traits they possess. Encourage them to become actively involved in their community, and introduce them to activities that promote a sense of cooperation and accomplishment. Be firm yet fair when handing down discipline for misdeeds or misbehaviors, and make certain the rules and consequences for breaking the rules are clearly defined. Show a cooperative, loving and united front with your spouse when it comes to discipline.
Accept and celebrate your child’s uniqueness. Remember that your child is an individual. Allow your child to have his or her own personal preferences and feelings, which may be different from your own.
And finally, encourage your child to be true to themselves by doing the same. Show your child how to make positive choices with the choices you make, and that nobody is perfect and you too make mistakes. Show your child that mistakes can be a great learning experience, and that they should not be ashamed or embarrassed about making them. .

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Before you go looking at baby cribs you should determine your budget. A good idea is to have a price range to work with. This will allow for more choices in the long run.

The main concern you should have whether you are buying a new crib or a used one. The crib must meet government standards. When you put the crib together be sure to so following the manufacturers directions exactly to ensure the greatest amount of safety for your child. It should also be used properly.

Safety concerns include the mattress. The mattress must be firm and tight fitting and there should be no missing or broken hardware. There should be no missing or loose slats. The slats should not be any more than 2 3/8 inches apart – about the width of a soda can. There should be no cutouts in the foot or headboards. If there are corner posts they should be no more than a sixteenth of an inch above the foot or head bar.

Drop sides on a crib is very convenient and is probably the most used feature on any crib. Fixed sides do not have the drop down feature and is great for tall people or those who will only be occasionally using the crib.
Most parents opt for a single drop down sided crib that allows them to easily lift baby out of the crib and to place him in the crib. This is especially convenient if your crib is placed against the wall. Double drop down sided cribs are a popular option among those parents who have room to place the crib so its not against the wall.

There are several ways in which drop sides can be lowered. There is the knee push lever and all you have to do is lean your knee against the crib side and it will drop. This is convenient if you have your baby in your arms.
The knee push sides may be the most common type available. Another common type is the foot bar. You balance on one foot and push the bar down with the other to lower the side. There is the double trigger drop mechanism. There are levers on both ends of the crib and you need both hands free to use them. You squeeze the triggers and then the side will drop. The problem with this type is that if you have the baby in your arms it will be next to impossible to operate.

The wheels on a crib are a great asset because it makes the crib easier to move to clean under or retrieve dropped toys as well as changing bedding. Make sure the casters are strong and turn easily. If you dont think you will need them you can put them aside in case you change your mind.
There are adjustable mattress heights available on all cribs with the exception of the cheapest models of cribs. The three position option is available and is the wisest choice. Two height position are acceptable. Single height mattress is not a safe choice because as your child grows the mattress should be lowered to prevent him from climbing out of the crib or toppling out of the crib.

You should look at the mattress supports as well. Some have vinyl straps that could wear out and break others have metal bar supports which is a better option. The best option however is a metal spring system where the entire mattress is supported and is the most durable of the three options.

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Leaving home and beginning your college career can be absolutely wonderful and extremely stressful. So whether you are a senior in high school preparing to go to college or you are at college looking for information about how to adjust to this huge change that has become your life, the following advice from an experienced teen life coaching may be for you.

You are entering college, a new world. You have left everything that is familiar to you behind, including, your family, friends, and school, community and your dog and cat. You may be an hour away by car or six hours away by plane. You are feeling out of sorts, lonely, too much time on your hands, awkward, etc. Your roommates are not saying any of this out loud and neither are you.

You want to call home and tell your parents that you just made the biggest mistake of your life and they should get in the car immediately or send you a ticket to come home. However, as you look around at the upper classmen, they look like they are okay, have it all together, wow- they even have friends! You are determined to figure out what is going on with you. Why am I so homesick? you wonder.

The first thing I want you to know is that your feelings are 100% normal and that the majority of freshman are experiencing exactly the same thing that you are. I have put together for you a list of things you can do to feel better.

This is not a recipe, with each ingredient dependent on the other, rather these are choices you can make to make this huge transition into college life and get rid of the homesick blues.

Talk with your roommates about what you are feeling. Most likely they are feeling it, too.

Stay in touch with your family and friends, but not in place of college activities.

Write an email to a friend at another college and share your feelings, compare notes.

Do something you enjoy like, exercise, art, writing, reading, and taking a walk. Dont sit around your dorm

room alone waiting for life to happen.

Ask someone to go the cafeteria with you for a meal. No one wants to eat alone.

Try to eat in moderation (watch the junk food), get enough sleep (invest in a good set of earplugs) and watch your intake of alcohol and drugs, which can all act as depressants. (In your effort to take a break from your depressive thoughts, using drugs can throw you into even a more depressed mood.)

Give your self-time, dont put yourself down. You are entering a new phase of your life.

Sometimes teens cant get going. If you feel that you need an extra push, nudge, support, consider a free Teen Life Coaching session. In one 45-minute call you could develop a plan to help you on your way to ridding the College Homesick Blues.

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