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One of my biggest frustrations in life is seeing parents who do not know how to parent. I believe strongly that being a parent is one of life’s greatest privileges. However, with this great privilege, like all other privileges, comes great responsibility. One of our greatest contributions to our society and to the generations that come behind us happens in the way that we parent are children. What could be more important than learning how to parent and doing it well?

You’ve all been there and seen it. A bowling alley late at night. Beside your lane are parents that look like kids themselves. They are enjoying beer and way too many cigarettes. You would never guess they were parents unless you saw their young children wandering around them in between frames. You know without looking at your watch that it is way too late for children that young to still be awake let alone out in public. You can’t help but wonder as their parents get drunk while ignoring them what kind of life the children lead and what kind of parents they truly are.

My desire to inform people about the realities of parenting began as a scene much like the one I just described happened as I bowled with friends one night. I went home to where my children were safely in bed after having been tucked into bed with their favorite story by their father and I just had to wonder what the lives of those neglected children would be like in twenty years compared to the lives of my own children twenty years down the road. I couldn’t help but think of the great role that a parent plays in the growth and development of their children.

If you are a parent, then please, please learn how to be a good parent. Take classes, read books, or get counseling. Do whatever is necessary for you to become the kind of parent that your children so desperately need in order to grow up as healthy, smart and successful people. The future of your children and even their children depend on the kind of parent you will be. Realize that raising children is one of the best privileges you could have in life. Take that privilege seriously and give your children the time, attention, and love that they need. The day you become a parent is the day that life stops being all about you. So please, if you are a parent or ever plan to be one, act like it. The whole world will be glad you did.

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Prior to mastering the art of speech, your baby has great difficulty in communicating his needs to you. This can cause frustration for you both – yet there is a solution. Baby sign language is rapidly becoming popular as a means of recognising – and responding to – a young baby’s needs.

Babies can be taught sign language from any age, but they really begin to take notice of the signs from around six months and may begin using them from as early as seven to eight months of age. As many parents will testify, babies understand an awful lot more than they are able to communicate through speech at this stage.

Some parents fear that using baby sign language may hamper their child’s speech development later on. Research into this subject, however, shows that children taught baby sign in infancy go on to develop superb language skills. In some cases, they may learn to speak earlier and often have an increased ability to learn a second language.

There are other benefits to introducing baby sign language – studies indicate that children who sign often develop a higher than average IQ. The major advantage for parents, of course, is to be able to identify their babies’ needs and respond appropriately – easing the frustrations that can lead to tantrums. Once this channel of communication is open, many parents feel that a deeper bond with their child is formed, creating a great sense of harmony.

There are various methods by which you can learn to sign with your child – no prior knowledge is needed, so learning along with your baby is part of the fun! It is important to remember to say the word when introducing any signs to your baby and to use the signs consistently – both in the home and outside it. Also, try to familiarise anyone who cares for your child with the signs they are using.

Some people like to invent their own signs to use with their babies, whereas others prefer to use conventional signs based on formal sign language – the advantage of using these is that they are recognised by a wide group of people. There are many books, DVDs and flashcards available, based on formal signing, that make learning this new skill both simple and enjoyable.

Taking into account the benefits that this simple communication can bring, it’s no wonder that more and more parents are using baby sign language – and achieving a fascinating insight into their babies’ minds!

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Want to be a better parent? Knowing what your current parenting style is will help you identify your needed areas for improvement. Promoting the self-discipline and self-esteem of the children in your family often requires an emotional juggling act by you as a parent. It is not easy to be firm and demanding with a child one minute, then warm and affectionate the next. This is an ongoing education process both for the parent and for the child. In addition, many adults naturally have personalities or temperaments that predispose them toward one parenting style or another.

Authoritarian Parenting

Parents who tend to overemphasize the discipline side of the equation are referred to as authoritarian. Authoritarian parents are demanding in the worst sense of the word. They are intimidators, requiring obedience and respect above all else. They become overly angry and forceful when they dont get that obedience and respect. Their love and acceptance appear totally conditional to the child. They do not teach or listen to their kids or explain the reason for their expectations, which are frequently unrealistic. They often see their childrens individuality and independence as irrelevant or threatening.

Research has shown that authoritarian parents tend to produce children who are more withdrawn, anxious, mistrustful and discontented. These children are often overlooked by their peers. Their self-esteem is often poor.

Permissive Parenting

Parents who overemphasize the self-esteem side of the equation are referred to as permissive. They may be warm and supportive, but they are not good disciplinarians – even in the privacy of their own home. They make only weak demands for good behavior and they tend to avoid or ignore obnoxious behavior. They seem to believe that children should grow up without any anger, tears or frustrations. They reinforce demanding and inconsiderate behavior from their children and often find it easier to just give in to their child’s demands. Their love and acceptance are unconditional in the worst sense of the word, for they set few rules or limits on what their children do.

Research has shown that permissive parents tend to produce children who are more immature, demanding and dependent. These children are often rejected by their peers. Their self-esteem is often unrealistic and hard to interpret, for they often blame others for their problems and misfortunes.

The Authoritative Parenting Model

Parents who are able to provide for both the discipline and self-esteem needs of their youngsters are referred to as authoritative. They clearly communicate highbut not unrealisticdemands for their childrens behavior. They expect good things from their kids and reinforce those things when they occur. They also tend to give more positive encouragement at the right places. When kids act up, on the other hand, authoritative parents respond with firm limits, but without fits of temper. They are warm, reasonable and sensitive to a childs needs. They are supportive of a childs individuality and encourage growing independence.

Authoritative parents tend to produce competent children. These kids are more self-reliant, self-controlled, content and happy. They are usually accepted and well-liked by their peers and perform better in school. Their self-esteem is good and they report having a happier childhood experience overall.

Where Do You Need Work as a Parent?

Logic and research, then, support the idea that children need both firm discipline and emotional support to grow up psychologically healthy. After reading the descriptions of the parenting styles above, if you found that you leaned too much toward the demanding, authoritarian style, then you need to work on the warm, supportive side of parenting. You need to have more fun with your kids, listen better and dole out more praise. If on the other hand, you leaned too much toward the permissive style, you need to work on establishing clear rules, setting limits, and confronting obnoxious behavior. Need to modify your parenting style? Start today!

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A majority of parents beat their children. Many school teachers punish children to correct them. They do it to teach them properly and make them good citizens of this world. How many of these parents and teachers themselves are good citizens of this world? How many of them themselves know what is right and what is wrong? How many have the knowledge of happy existence and how many have the right to beat a child?

No one. Absolutely, no one has any right to beat a child. They beat the child, because the child does not retaliate. The child is helpless. The child is at their mercy. The parents and teachers take advantage of this and sadistically take out their own frustrations on the children. What if they try doing this to someone of their age and strength? They will get it back. That is why they don’t do that. They look for helpless children, find faults and beat. This is inhuman.

In any civilized society such practices should be punishable. A child is like a flower. The child needs love, care and proper guidance. No beating and no harsh words. A child does not come into the world to learn things, solve sums and become a scientist overnight. A child comes to this world to make this world a better place with its innocence and curiosity.

Why not beat everyone on the earth, who needs correction? And who does not need correction? Ask any boss, and according to them, all the assistants need some correction. Ask any married person and they will tell you thousand deficiencies of their partner. Ask a leader and they will tell you how all the opposition leaders are bankrupt in their thinking. And find out about the Presidents and Prime Ministers from the opposition leaders and you will get an earful.

The whole world needs correction. Next time, before a child is beaten, let us line up all the citizens of this world and correct all of them. Who will do that? No one is left out. Better stop touching a child. That should be the message to all the parents and teachers. Let this practice stop forever in all the countries.

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Getting married and having children is the way of life fort all of us. The question is – are we ready to get married and after that are we ready to become father? Why this question? Let us discuss.

Most of us are not always ready to get married. We are waiting for the right partner. We have career and money issues. We have emotional issues. We dont want to get married in hurry and then break up. We therefore weigh all the options and wait for the opportune time. Only after we are satisfied, we get married. Am I correct?

Becoming a father is equally difficult. Before becoming a father, you have to make sure that your wife is ready to become a mother. That both of you have settled in the marriage and dont foresee much problem ahead. Your career has picked up and you are saving money. You have a good home and you are otherwise free of problems. Only after satisfying yourself about all these, can you think of becoming a father.

Fatherhood involves many issues. As soon as you get a child, you will find that your wife is paying more attention to her child than to you. Your nights will not be as peaceful as before. Visits to doctors may increase. Vacationing may become difficult and partying may have to e cut. There are many such changes that a new child brings along with lot of joy. Please think about the pros and cons before deciding to become a father. Your child should never suffer because of your own frustrations. Your kid will be your most precious possession. Think carefully and decide.

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Are you troubled by your child’s disinterest in reading? Maybe you have a young child just learning to read. You try to encourage the learning by reading together. However, each reading session is a struggle. Your child shuns it like a hated vegetable . Or maybe your child can already read, but just doesn’t want to. They even tell you straight in your face, “I hate reading.”

How did it come to this? Why does your child dislike reading? Basically, it comes down to one thing: the love for reading was never ignited or have been extinguished. Here are 8 ways to kill a child’s love for reading:

1. Reading sessions are more like drilling sessions. Don’t quiz and test children when reading. It’s ok to point things out and ask questions to promote thinking but make sure it stays FUN. Don’t turn it into a pressurized teaching session. Yes, you hope that they learn something from the reading but don’t make that your main objective. Read to enjoy the story. Learning usually takes place when the teaching is not so obvious.

2. Television, video and computer games takes center stage when it comes to relaxation and entertainment. These strongly distracts children from reading. There needs to be a limit to these activities if you want to convince them that books can be entertaining too.

3. Reading books that are too difficult for their reading level. It is very discouraging for children to open a book and not know how to read many of the words. Where is the joy when you struggle to get through a page? Know your child’s reading ability and get books appropriate to their level.

4. Reading sessions turn into screaming and put down sessions. Parents need to hold realistic expectations of their children. Control frustrations when children don’t excel as fast as you wish they would. Watch your tongue and avoid derogatory remarks such as “Can’t you remember that word, we just read it,” or “I’ve told you many times already. What’s wrong with you?”

5. Reading books that are of no interest to them. How do children regard these books? BORING! To a young boy, reading a book on dinosaurs may be more captivating than reading a book about Dick and Jane. Draw your teenagers into reading with books that they can relate too. I know when I was that age I was game for books on love, romance, and friendship. Capitalize on your child’s hobbies and interests.

6. Forced reading. for older children, sometimes homework is in the form of assigned readings. Usually a report has to be handed in at the end. Although this is done under good intentions, it is easy for a child to regard reading as a chore to be done. Very likely too, the assigned reading is not of their choice and therefore, not of their liking. Reading in this situation is like dragging feet in the mud.

7. Peer pressure. This is another factor that affects older children. Kids can be cruel with their branding and teasing. The term “nerds” and “geeks” are usually thrown at those that indulge in books. Your child may very well choose to shun books just to fit in and be one of the “cool kids.”

8. Limiting what children read. Imagine if you loved sci-fi books but was told you could only read classics. What a damper that would be for you right? Be open to what your child wants to read. You may think your child has moved passed picture books but he wants it anyway. Let him. Or you may think reading comic books have less educational value then reading well known novels. Remember, it’s a book in their hands nonetheless. So, whether it be fiction, non-fiction, picture books, comic books, magazines etc… be supportive.

You want to get your child reading, you have to first show that it is fun and enjoyable. Don’t push too hard to get your child to learn to read or read to learn. Only when there is love for reading can the learning begin.

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