At first I thought of titling this article “The Lazy Parent’s Guide” but then I realized that most parents aren’t lazy, but they may have a slightly different philosophy about children and learning.

If you’re a big reader yourself or if you’re homeschooling, you’re probably concerned about how to teach your child to read. Reading is one of the most important skills a person can learn, and a great joy in life.

My laid-back methods of teaching a child to read:

1) Be a reader yourself

Children naturally want to copy adult behavior. If your kids see you often with your nose in a book, they will probably begin to wonder what is so interesting about this activity.

2) Read to your kids

This is probably a huge no-brainer. Read to your kids early and often. And don’t read in order to “teach your child how to read”. I believe that the best way to teach your child to read is to NOT teach your child to read!

Read to your child because you enjoy it and it’s fun. Some forward-thinking education experts believe that the teaching of reading is mostly what prevents reading. After all, don’t adults read as a means to an end? Because they want to learn something or because they enjoy the act of reading?

3) Don’t worry so much

Don’t worry about a right or wrong way of reading to your child.

If your preschool-age child isn’t interested in books yet, or won’t sit still for more than 30 seconds to finish a story, don’t fret.

If your 3 year old wants to point at pictures or turn to favorite pages and ask a million questions, don’t fuss.

Children learn in different ways than adults do and I don’t think anyone knows enough about the human mind to figure it all out. Make reading together pleasant, not stressful.

And don’t worry about how old your child is when they learn to read. If they’re reading at 3 or at 8, studies show that it makes little difference in their intelligence or ability by the time they reach middle school.

4) Pick topics that interest your child

My oldest son’s interest in reading really skyrocketed when we started the Series of Unfortunate Events books by Lemony Snicket. We would sit for hours and read aloud together when he was only 5 or 6. Visit Lemony Snicket’s Series of Unfortunate Events for more information about these books.

These books were technically above his age level, but I advise you to forget all that.

John Holt, the legendary educator and author, has been quoted as saying:

“Its nice to have childrens books, but far too many of them have too much in the way of pictures. When children see books, as they do in the family where the adults read, with pages and pages and pages of print, it becomes pretty clear that if youre going to find out whats in those books, youre going to have to read from that print. I dont think theres any way to make reading interesting to children in a family in which it isnt interesting to adults.”

So let your child pick books from the library or bookstore and don’t concern yourself about whether the titles are “age appropriate”.

5) Strictly limit TV and other electronic media

A growing body of evidence is pointing to the fact that TV, video games and computer usage are hurting our children’s interest in reading. TV and video games rewire the brain and teach it to be lazy. Reading is much more work, because the mind can’t be passive while engaging in it (unlike plug-in entertainment). Kids who get bored are more likely to pick up a book.

Above all, have fun snuggling up with your child and enjoy reading together!

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Let us examine our relationship with grown ups. With most of our friends and acquaintances, we are guarded in our approach. We think before speaking. We try to hide most of our true feelings and try to act in a way that we believe will maintain a make believe relationship. How many times, have you thought of shouting at someone, but have refrained from doing so? How many times have you wished to laugh at someone’s dressing sense but have stopped that laughter? How many times have you really wanted to tell someone few things but stopped midway worried that it may spoil the relationship? Please think about the artificial way in which we relate with grown up people. We do all this because we are unsure of ourselves. We are unsure about the other person’s reaction and intelligence and we are unsure about the relationship.

With a child nothing of this kind exists. We are free to express ourselves in as many ways as we wish, without any reservations. That is why we love children and call them cute.

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For some reason, everyone seems to think that a baby should be walking by his first birthday, but the fact is that most babies dont walk until after this time. There are a few who walk as early as nine months of age, but a great many who dont take their first steps until fifteen months. And, if your child is a late walker, it has absolutely no bearing on his intelligence.

The age at which a baby walks is often genetic. Walking very early or very late often runs in the family. My husband walked at nine months, and I walked at ten months, so we were unlucky enough to have a daughter who also walked at ten months. She was very petite, so she looked like the worlds tiniest walking human. She also scaled the kitchen counters before she was a year old, so you can see what I mean by unlucky.

When your baby walks is also often related to his size. Babies with short legs usually walk sooner than those with long legs (a balance issue) and thinner babies usually walk sooner than their more plump counterparts.

Pushing your baby to walk is not a good idea, but providing him the opportunity to learn is critical. If you force your child to endure daily practice sessions, he may just rebel and refuse to walk for quite a while. On the other hand, if you keep him in swing or playpen all day, hell never have the opportunity to try out his skills. Give him some supervised time on the floor, and hell figure the rest out with or without your help.

If, by chance, your child is not walking by the age of eighteen months, it is best to have him checked out by a doctor. There is not necessarily anything wrong, but most babies are walking by this age, so have him examined as a precaution. But, dont be too eager, because once he starts walking, all the rules change. Someone, though I dont remember who, once said, – We spend the first two years of our childrens lives teaching them to walk and talk, and then the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. Its so true.

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I have also read about the idea that there are several levels of learning. The lowest level of learning, is just memorizing the material and being able to “regurgitate” it in the same term it was presented, and the highest levels of learning are the learning styles that use the material in other contexts, and the learning style that builds on top of the material learned.

For example, when you teach your child about addition, and he immediately understands the concept of subtraction. Or if you teach your child about the structure of the dinosaurs teeth in relation to their food, and your child looks at your pet and tries to guess the structure of their teeth, based on their food.

Well – you don’t need to wait for your child to develop that level of learning by himself. You can develop this habit and way of thinking on purpose. Here are some examples:

If you have a baby, and you are looking for books to read to your baby or to read with your baby, choose for several books with related subjects. For example, if you have a book that tells a story about an animal ( a bear, a duck, whatever animals often appear in children’s books), prepare another book that gives different information about the same animal. The child will associate the information in one book to the information in the other book.

For school age children: if you are helping your child with math, always find a use for the concept you are learning. For example: addition. Tell a story that demonstrates the use of addition: for example: “John went to the store to buy candy. He bought one bar of Snickers that cost him 1 dollar and 1 bag of Chocolate Kisses that cost 2 dollars. How much did he spend?

If you help your child with history, and the discussion is about a certain place, pull out a map and show him exactly where the place is, and learn something about the geography of this particular place.

You don’t have to wait for your child to do some school activity. Whenever you discuss something, or observe something that calls your attention, when you come home find a piece of information about that subject in the encyclopedia, to read about. For example, you have taken your child to visit a friend, and you have heard that one of the friend’s parents is a lawyer. When you come home, find a story about a famous lawyer, or some other bit of information about lawyers. Remind your child that the friend’s parent is a lawyer, just like in the story.

In this way, you are developing in your child the habit of looking for a way to apply the information they acquire. To look for the association between different bits of information. To relate their knowledge to other fields and subjects. This is true intelligence.

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